Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
How I know that I'm single: when I get a save the date for a wedding & I read "& guest" my first thought was does my bottle of Jack Daniels count.
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
Randomize
