can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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