come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
Randomize
