i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
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