Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
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