OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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