WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
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