So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
I made him laugh his dick is mine
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Randomize
