i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
