But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
Randomize
