Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
Randomize