Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Randomize