You're my little dorito
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
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