yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Randomize
