This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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