Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Randomize
