i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
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