My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
Houston, we have a blender
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
Randomize
