Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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