FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Randomize
