Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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