What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Randomize
