Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
This can only be settled by a dance off.
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