so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
When did angry sex become our thing?
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
Randomize
