Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize
