i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
