make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize
