He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
Apparently drunk me thought it was time for a career change. I woke up with a message from Mcdonalds saying that I was hired as the new cashier.
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
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