Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
don't judge my taste in strippers
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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