ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
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