Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize
