I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
You want to complain about your sex life to me? Right now mine consists of trying to masturbate lightly enough not to wake her up with bed shakes. Go. Fuck. Yourself.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
