This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
Last night the nurse at the ER told me that she wished all her drunk patients were like me. Then she commented on my socks...
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
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