Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
Randomize