We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
Randomize
