She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Randomize
