I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
Randomize
