weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
Randomize
