Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Randomize
