Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
Randomize
