i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Randomize
