Christians are straight up FREAKS
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
I think you'll appreciate my way of waking up today: Under my cubicle, boxed in by boxes of printer paper, and hung over. I don't even know how the fuck I got in here in the middle of the night. I went to my car and fell back asleep. I'm now 2 1/2 hours late.
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Randomize
