My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
