you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
