am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
Bring me that man meat
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize