we're blogging at a bar
when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
I'm not looking forward to the waking up early part. Or actually the wedding part. Or the reception part. But I am looking forward to the meaningless sex with some random guy I meet at the reception part.
these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
Randomize
