I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
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