Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
it was like eating out sand paper
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
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