it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
