I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
