On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
Randomize
